What I want...

Both kids are on playdates...at other people's homes.  I am so thoroughly enjoying the peace and quiet.  I could be working, doing laundry or any number of household chores, but instead I am using my hour to just bask in being in an otherwise empty house.

I love planning trips, I love taking them too.  I also love my kids.  But what I would like is 1 weekend, or even just 1 full day and a night with just Dennis and I in the house.  The number of projects we'd complete...or maybe we could have a movie marathon and sit and eat bbq potato chips.  I have such a long list of projects that take a couple hours and when we do them with kids they take all day.   I know that in a few short years we'll start sending the kids to summer camp overnight and then I'll long for the noise.

That's why I'm enjoying my hour today. 

Slowly returning

I feel like I"m slowly re-emerging, returning to a time when my time in front of a computer was focused on chronicling our lives whereas lately it has been to shop and plan trips, play on social media.  Den hasn't been traveling nearly as much as he used to and we've developed a nice little habit of him putting the kids to bed while pretend to be productive, but instead get sucked into the computer.  In an effort to be more productive, I thought I'd give the blog a whirl...at least I'd have something to show for it.

So classes I want to take: writing, photography, sailing, parenting, scrapbooking. J is 6 now and keeps changing her mind of what kind of party she wants.  It's killing me a little bit.  Every time I think I have something worked out, she changes.  At this rate, she will be 7 before she has a party!  Ed is now 8.  And I'm ready to take them to EUROPE!!  I'm actually ready to take them this summer, but Dennis wanted to wait another year.

So bring on your tips for France.  We'll see where else we go from there.  I want to visit friend in Brussels and England, but Ed wants to hit Italy.  We only have 19 days, so I'm not sure how we'll do this and not be super worn out.  I wish we could go for more time.  If Den gets another conference there...

Trips I'm planning for this year:  Black Hills, Philly, Boston (speaking of which today is the when the bombs went off at the Boston Marathon).  I'm sure looking back, that will be a moment in time.  We'll also hit the beach and Wisc to see the grandparents.  The kids and I will hit Georgia to see the other grandparents, who have now become the GA grandparents. 

In the last couple years I developed a goal of taking the kids to all 50 states before Ed graduated high school.  I have 10 years and 25 states left.  Eddie is in on the deal, trying to plan travel only to places he hasn't been and Josie seems game to go anywhere new.  I think they will get 4 or 5 this year. 

Den is now downstairs from putting the kids to bed, so I think I'd better tie this post up with a bow...

It has been so long since I posted that I have forgotten my login info and Blogger has added features that make me feel like it's been 20 years! Nearly 8 years ago I started this blog--primarily so that daddy could see photos of his kids while he was away on his often back to back trips.  Now there are so many mechanisms that I can use...facebook, twitter, instagram, and that doesn't even scratch the surface of all the hipster social networking sites out there. 

I'm amazed too at the number of the blogs, so many of them well written and helpful.  I'm stunned at how thoroughly people will bear their souls, with varying degrees an anonymity.  I've spent my 30s growing up and growing into my own.  The clarity I have now in my life makes it easier to age.  I think about all that I know now about myself and the journey that becoming a mother has been.  I don't want to bear my soul, I don't want to share intimate details of my life for all to read.  I will continue to write the dry, minutiae blog this has been because it's fun like a scrapbook to look back and see what has been.

Crazy Times

Why is it when I'm most stressed and pressed for time, I feel the need to write.  I think it helps me clear my head and regain focus.  If I get all these things out there that I've got floating around, I can sit down and work on what I need to do.

I read an article about memory today (tweeted it I liked it so much).  It talked about people who have incredible recall of their day to day life events.  I have a pretty good recall, but not the level these folks do.  Part of why I like to scrapbook is that it preserves for me those memories. I use the memorabilia as a tool to jog my memory, along with the photo and hopefully with most trips and events, with some notes I've made.  This article reinforced for me why I always feel the pressure to work on events that are about 6 months old.  Somehow I can't remember so much from when Eddie and Josie were babies, yet I never got their baby books done.  So many parts of their lives that they can't recall have slipped away and I'll never get them back...well except for from this blog :)  And all the pictures and all the crap I've saved.  But I've not always done a good job of noting the mundane, or the sort of phases.  I do, I guess but not in the way I'd like.

Lately I've been telling myself that when I don't have a job anymore I'll have the time to organize my craft area, get my sewing table up and be productive.  I'm going at such a high rate of speed these days, that I actually had to sub-contract the ironing.  I love to iron.  Not the actual act, but that I get to be productive while watching a TV program and I am usually by myself. 

So, I agreed to stay on with my boss for another 2-3 months, until around Thanksgiving.  Eeekkk!  It will be a great experience, but I'm not sure if I'm fully prepared for all the work that it will entail.  I'm going to have to become more efficient and do less web surfing.  Do more work after the kids are in bed.  Grocery shop at another time of day, I don't know.  Ugh.  I did learn that Sunday night is not a good night to go to the grocery.  Everything was picked over.  Tuesday and Wednesday meanwhile are supposed to be much better.  That is when I will focus in the future.  I've done mid-week shopping most of the time, but we were really low...

Today the following things happened in our lives:  Eddie comes downstairs in the first pair of long pants he has worn in about 4 months (except for 1 day this summer) and the are floods.  Not just the skim above the top of your shoes floods, but FLOODS.  They are a good 3-4 inches above his shoes.  He doesn't want to take them off.  It's time to leave for church.  Shamefully I tell him the one thing I KNOW will move him with speed.  "Your pants look like capri's, and boys don't normally wear capris."  He was changed out of those clothes so fast you could barely blink.

Josie didn't realize she had school tomorrow.  Whoops.  This is her first school weekend.  She was a little sad.  She was also crazy tired tonight.  I don't understand why. It wasn't an overly taxing weekend.  Hopefully getting her to bed around 7:30 will do the trick. 

Eddie and Josie earned more money for Walt Disney World today by helping us clean out the garage.  Surprisingly, Eddie stuck with it most of the time and was willing to do the work.  Course we were paying him $20, but it was a lot of not very fun stuff:  carrying stuff out of the garage, washing it off, drying, and then bringing it back to the garage.  And there was a lot of stuff. He thinks J should only earn $5 because she did a fraction of the work.  He's kind of right.

I made Cookie's rice again tonight.  It was a hit again.  Eddie is already eating more food than me.  He said he was so hungry today and didn't know why.  And he was.  He was just devouring everything.

Okay, head is more cleared, back to work.

First Day Back

I remember being in kindergarten.  I don't remember my first day -- but I remember being super tiny and having to stretch to climb the steps of the bus.  Our bus driver was Mr. Jackson, a thin, older black man who always seemed so calm and had something nice to say to everyone.  I can't imagine how long the bus ride must have been, because to drive to school by car took at least 10 minutes. 

Josie and Eddie started school today--J in Kinder and Eddie in 2nd grade.  It's definitely been harder on the parents than the kids.  Don't get me wrong, we are excited for the kids and happy to have them reach this milestone, as that is the point of parenting--to set them free and help them get there, but at the same time...

No more babies, no more preschool, no more detailed daily reports from school about what happened during the day.  It's an adjustment. 

Both came home full of smiles and stories from the day.  Josie played with a little girl named Ava.  Eddie found his friend Jake at recess and the two set out to find a 3rd friend, Tanner who was in yet a different class.  Josie got to see them on the soccer field from her spot on the kinder playground during recess.  Makes me happy that they get to see each other during the day.  As they walked home from the bus stop, Josie asks Eddie, "did you have a good first day of second grade?" and the answer was Yes!

While Time Passes By

I used to write on here religiously--mostly when Dennis was away to update him on the kids.  I've since printed most of those into books, which I love.  In the time since I have started this blog about 7 years ago, so many blogs related to parenting have popped up that it is impossible to track or know them all.

I used to fancy myself a decent writer---back when I was in college writing all the time.  Someday I'd like to get back into it, revive the ability to convey my thoughts with language that is fun to read.  I suppose I should read some more to get closer to that goal, but gosh, being a mother, a wife, and having a part-time job sure makes that difficult.

Eddie and Josie--where to begin---fortunately I've been sort of tracking their progress on family calendars, but wowee, J starts Kinder this year (I can't spell kindergarden, so you'll never see me call it that) and Eddie starts 2nd grade.  I'm trying to embrace these years and enjoy them---I'm doing a better job of it day by day.

They are a really fun age right now and I figure we have about 6-8 years more of really good travel opportunities before we'll have to be more limited, so I've of course made a long list of my travel goals.  And...then I realized it was after 1am.  Goodnight!

Where Does the Time GO?

Eddie is now in first grade.  First grade is proving to be really easy.  He's doing his second year of Spanish and started Chess this year.  He loves Chess and I'm sure will beat me as soon as I remember enough to play a game with him (it's been a while since Uncle Kevin taught me).  He did gymnastics this fall and really enjoyed it, but the 30 minute trip each way was too much for us, so we're going to keep trying to get him into a gym closer to home.  He is into the social side of school and tries really hard to behave--priding himself in never getting in trouble.  Too bad he can't bring that mentality home. 

Josie is in her final year of preschool.  She is definitely ready for kindergarten, but is enjoying her time.  She started ballet this year and absolutely loves it.  It's funny managing the social lives of a preschooler and kinder.  They are extremely excited for Halloween this year and are both dressing as black cats.  Eddie and Josie love wearing matching outfits--which can prove difficult when one loves pink and the other blue.  Send me a note of you have resources for brother/sister outfits.  It's harder than you'd think!

Josie has become really independent AND helpful since my foot injury (and I just re injured it last week).  Eddie has other things in mind in terms of helping out.

Best head to bed...will try and upload photos...but want to see the end of game 2 of the World Series....

My poor neglected blog...

Between Facebook, twitter, and the hecticness of life, combined that the iphone ap for blogger is horrible, I never post here anymore.  Harder to upload photos too.  Waiting for Den to stop working so we can go to bed.  I would go to bed myself but I would just lay there, so I might as well play on the computer...

Just 2.5 weeks until school starts.  I'm both sad and happy.  Sad because I was sick the last 3 weeks and while I am back up to about 85%, still limited in what activities I can do with the kids.  I had a 2 page typed list of activities we were going to do this summer.  Not among them was sit on the sofa all day and watch the kids play with their toys.  Last summer Eddie had his really bad rash that dominated our activities and this summer it's me.  Hopefully we'll catch a break next summer. 

At least we are rounding a corner.  Need to always find the positive.  Plus, I've been in PT now for 4 months and I think I'm getting close enough to where I'll be able to make the 2 mile round trip to walk Eddie to school this year.  Very excited about that.  So excited that school starts because I'm ready for the kids to have a routine again.  I think it's hard for them because I've been so sick that the routine has basically been survival mode and anything goes.  I really wish we had Eddie in year round school.  I think it's a better model--he's forgotten so much this summer.

Finally time to turn in... 

Anyone still out there?

It has been an interesting several months.  Sept. 23 I got a moderately sprained ankle walking Eddie to school.  I was almost healed a week later and then very severely injured the ankle.  That time I went to the doctor and he ordered an X-ray, which turned out to be fine.

Month later (mid Oct), still not better, got referred to an orthopedist.  Got a boot and was told to gradually wean myself from the boot as my foot feels better.  Improved nicely until the Sat. before Thanksgiving, following doctors instructions, I was walking 15 feet from my dining room to my kitchen and I felt intense burning pain in my foot and ankle.  Got an MRI on Tuesday which showed a bone bruise.  This is basically like taking a hammer to the bone and you have lots of tiny fractures.  

Orthopedist said it would take 6 weeks to heal and to then start PT.  6 weeks of PT for 3 days/week and Josie had more playdates and I imposed on more people than I'd care to think about.  5th week of PT, I asked a Therpist I'd never worked with prior to that if she thought I could visit Costco without having to use the wheelchair.  She said as long as I used my boot.  

Got to the back of the store and was in immense pain...and I had kind of been riding on the back of the cart.  Ortho again...thinks I have an overuse issue.  Says to stay off my foot and use crutches.  Month later, in early March finally starting to feel better and can walk around my house almost the whole day.  Pushed too hard and ended up with another MRI to rule out stress fracture. 

Ortho convinced it is an endocrinologist issue, but neither of the doctors I see think this is the case, but I did get a blood draw just to be sure.  Fast forward 3 weeks and I'm once again feeling better, but just walking around the house manage to overdo it and I"m back on crutches. 

Had apt today with a foot/ankle specialist.  Had another set of xrays, more extensive than the first time...about 6 different images.  He was puzzled as everything looked fine on MRIs (bone bruise still present, but starting to heal and ligaments still torn).  he thinks I have a stress fracture that just isn't showing up on the MRI.  Said that he would try the boot again and then if in a couple weeks I don't see improvement, he would recommend a cast for 6 weeks and then PT after that (guessing for 6-8 weeks).

To be honest, I really don't think it will solve the issue because the real issue is that I keep being on the verge of being healed and then I push too hard too soon and something stupid like an overuse issue happens.  I just don't see how wearing a boot for a couple weeks will do the trick because invariably i will just get back to where I seem to go over 4-6 weeks.

He said if after a cast and PT, I am still not well, then he'll refer me to pain management so they can try and isolate the pain and figure out ways for me to deal.  The most depressing thing about that prognosis is that I never realized how active I liked to be and how much walking I enjoyed, nor how I just took it for granted.

I have an apt for another foot/ankle specialist in a couple weeks (made the apt over a month ago).  He has a reputation for solving issues that previously have been mysteries, so hopefully he will be of help.

To say I'm at the end of my rope would be a gross understatement, yet I try and remain positive because there is just nothing else I can do.  I follow doctors instructions.  Part of me wonders if it is something else like cancer or something where I can't heal...couple friends have suggested lupus.  

While I appreciate everyone who asks about how I am or what happened and I completely understand the motivation for doing so, I have grown tired of the sorrowful looks, the confident advice from people without an MD behind their name and having to repeat my story over and over.  I have learned to use humor, to try and avoid answering the questions, etc. When I borrowed crutches from a neighbor over 6 months ago, I never dreamed I would still be using them.

At this point, I'm just hoping to be able to walk my kids to school next fall.  It used to be I hoped for prior to the end of the year, but i keep having to revise my timeline.

Hello Again!

It's been so long, I'm not sure if I should try and capture what we've been up to or just jump right into the photos. These are clearly a month old, but we finally discovered our local pumpkin patch--and it is FUN--in that corny sort of old tyme fun sort of way. Plus they have awesome kettle corn everywhere you turn.
We had such a good time that I had Den take the kids out the Saturday after Halloween to their pumpkin 'drop/smash'. They dropped the state fair winning pumpkin, over 600 pounds, from a crane.

Den is currently in the same City, staying at the same hotel that he visited the week before Thanksgiving --and I am still hobbling around.

Eddie is enjoying kindergarden and we had a good conference with his teacher--Den was out of town, but we called so he could feel like he was there. I can only hope that Josie gets this same teacher when she comes through. She is so calm and kind. J is not a fan of her teachers at preschool and I think the feeling is mutual. J seems to have just dug in and realized that she will enjoy the aspects of preschool if not the teachers. We will get through the year.

I have really noticed the kids temperments and personalities this year, more than ever before. It is fascinating to watch and see where before I always thought Eddie was so shy, he is definitely a social animal and where I always thought J was my social kid, she seems a bit more impacted when someone doesn't return her advances.

I'll try and post more. For some reason picassa hasn't 'found' the photos I uploaded from November....